Just yesterday I fired up my new Dell PC
onto my face crept a grin,
kinda sneaky.
'Cause Team Fortress was the game I was about to play,
I needed my
fix of Quake for the day.
So I picked a server with a very low ping,
and immediately I did hear the rockets sing.
The Blue team was outnunbered and down by three,
I thought "now
here's a team that really needs me."
My class was Soldier, the warrior of the
bunch,
I was set to eat these Red guys for lunch.
I grabed a pack full of rockets and grenades,
and headed outside
for my daring flag raid.
I jumped off the balcony, but before I hit
the ground.
My body exploded from a Sniper rifle round.
This made me mad as hell right away
I
had just gotten here... that sniper was gonna pay!
So this time I went right out the front door,
and unloaded serveral
rockets, they left with a roar.
There was nothing that poor sniper could
do,
he never saw them coming as his legs, off they flew.
So I ran across the bridge before he could
return,
and rocket jumped the balcony (Man, does that burn!)
I was in the enemy's fort and I was ready.
To capture the flag, I had to keep my mind steady.
I saw an Engineer, he was building a
sentry,
I had to kill him and it before my scouts could gain entry.
I unloaded three rockets all of which met their mark,
He never saw
what hit him, I was just like a shark.
After that, I headed down the spiral with
care,
The fact that I was coming, they were already aware.
I reached the basement and what did I see?
a bunch of yellow pipes just waiting for me.
So I tiptoed close trying to see where the
demo stood,
I knew if his pipes exploded, I also would.
He was hiding in the corner and did not know I saw him lurking,
and
soon his corpse lay still, not even jerking.
As he and his pipes became but a memory,
I was suprised by the chatter of a flag room sentry.
I knew that my nail grendes could do the job,
and clear me a path,
so the flag I could rob.
After the message "the sentry was destroyed",
I grabbed
the flag, now the enemy I had to avoid.
I was half way up the spiral when some
pipes I met,
there was nothing I could have done my destiny was set.
My head went flying and my legs turned to
ground beef,
and the flag fell gently to the ground like a leaf.
It's not just a job, it's an adventure I
say,
When you play Team Fortress day after day.
You're bound to get gibbed, it happens
many a time,
but the true measure of a warrior is helping your team
out of a bind.
So in mm2 I called out the flags new
location,
and set out to take it on an over-the-bridge vacation.
I battled my way back to where the flag
laid,
I had to clear out those pipes so my comrades could raid.
I saw the pipes strewn all 'round the
flag,
I was no fool - I knew I'd be fragged.
. But I bravely looked death in the eye
as I ran over the pipes and heard the demo say "bye-bye"
But little did he know that the kill was a
mistake,
'cause before he could reload, a scout wriggled out like a
snake.
I was dead on the ground as my teammate
ran and ran
No one could catch him and he had the flag in hand.
Not long after the cap, the game had
ended,
and I stared at the screen and felt a little winded.
My heart was beating fast, but the game was done.
I felt fine even
though we had not won.
For I had slain many enemies and waded
through their blood,
I had gibbed them and fragged them until guts
ran in a flood.
But why did they have to die, those Red
that I slew ?
So we could cap the flag for the great glory of Blue !